There are seasons of life when the fire feels all-consuming. Loss, shame, disappointment, or circumstances beyond our control can make it feel like everything we once relied on is burning to the ground. In those moments, the temptation is strong to grasp for control, to cling to anything that feels stable, or to shut down entirely. Yet, in the middle of the flames, God whispers an invitation: Will you trust Me here? Will you surrender, even when nothing makes sense?

This is where radical obedience comes in. It isn’t about polished faith or easy answers. It’s about choosing trust when the outcome is uncertain, choosing surrender when the pain is real, and choosing to believe God’s character when everything else feels shaky.

On the It’s Your Story to Tell podcast, I recently sat down with Shawna Foster, author of Faith in the Flames: Transforming Trauma into Hope and Healing. Shawna’s story is a living testimony of what it looks like to walk through the fire of parental alienation with open hands and an obedient heart. 

Her journey reminds us that obedience in suffering is not about perfection it’s about presence. God’s presence in our fire, and our willingness to yield to Him even when the heat feels unbearable.

Shawna’s Story: When the Flames Rose Higher

Shawna knows what it means to walk through a fire that could have consumed her. Her story is marked by pain, shame, and the struggle of motherhood. 

 The details of her circumstances, though unique, echo a reality many of us know: life does not always turn out as we expect. There are chapters that break our hearts, choices we regret, and losses that leave us undone.

But instead of letting the fire destroy her, Shawna allowed it to refine her. She surrendered her illusions of control, leaned into God’s presence, and discovered that obedience in the fire is not about escaping pain it’s about encountering God in the midst of it.

Out of that season came her book, Faith in the Flames, a raw and redemptive testimony for women who feel too broken to rise. What began as journal entries written in the dark became a message of hope and healing for others. 

Her story illustrates a truth we often forget: radical obedience is not flashy, and it is rarely easy. But it always bears fruit sometimes in ways we could never imagine.

If you’re a parent walking through your own fire or wanting to learn how to steady your family in the midst of conflict and chaos I want to personally invite you to join me for Sacred Presence, a free 6-week transformational training beginning November 6, 2025. 

This journey is designed for moms and dads who long to become trauma-informed, heal their own hearts, and create safety and resilience for their children. Together, we’ll practice emotional regulation, compassion, and practical tools to bring peace into fractured places. Your healing doesn’t just change you it changes your family, and through them, the world.

Link to Sacred Presence for Parents  Sacred Presence I Support for Parent's Walking Through Family Fracture

Take a Step into Obedience Today

When we hear the word obedience, it can sometimes carry connotations of blind compliance or heavy rules. But biblical obedience is far deeper and more intimate. It is a posture of trust in God’s goodness and sovereignty, even when circumstances seem to scream the opposite.

Radical obedience in the fire looks like:

• Surrendering control when we want to fix everything ourselves.
• Clinging to God’s Word when our feelings tell us He has abandoned us.
• Choosing forgiveness when bitterness feels easier.
• Continuing to show up in faith, even when prayers seem unanswered.

It is costly. It requires laying down our illusions of safety and our timelines of how life should look. But in return, it gives us something far greater: intimacy with God, resilience through trials, and the kind of peace that cannot be shaken by external circumstances.

The Neuroscience of Curiosity in the Fire

Here’s where faith and science beautifully meet. Neuroscience tells us that the way we approach our pain determines how our brains and bodies process it. When we resist pain with fear or denial, our nervous system goes into survival mode fight, flight, or freeze. This shuts down our capacity to think clearly, make meaning, or see possibilities.

But when we approach pain with curiosity, the brain engages the prefrontal cortex the area responsible for problem-solving, perspective, and growth. Curiosity literally rewires the way our nervous system experiences pain. Instead of staying stuck in loops of fear or despair, curiosity opens the door for healing, creativity, and even faith.

In spiritual terms, curiosity sounds like this:

• “God, where are You in this?”
• “What do You want to teach me here?”
• “What lies are being exposed that You want to replace with truth?”

Radical obedience doesn’t mean pretending the fire doesn’t hurt. It means choosing to stay curious in the heat, trusting that God is both present and purposeful in what feels unbearable. It is the difference between being consumed by the flames and being refined by them.

Practicing Radical Obedience

So how do we live this out when we’re the ones in the fire? Here are a few ways:

1. Name the Fire Honestly
   Obedience doesn’t mean denial. Acknowledge what is hard. Write it down. Speak it out. Bring it to God raw and unedited.
2. Choose Surrender Daily
   Instead of trying to solve the entire problem at once, ask: What is one thing I can surrender today? It may be your expectations, your timeline, or your need to be understood.
3. Stay Anchored in Scripture
   Shawna shared how certain verses became lifelines during her season of pain. Find your anchors—verses that remind you of God’s character when everything else feels unstable.
4. Practice Curiosity Over Control
   Shift the question from “Why me?” to “What are You doing here, Lord?” This reorients your brain from panic to openness, making room for peace and purpose.
5. Take One Brave Step
   Radical obedience doesn’t always look like a giant leap. Sometimes it’s a quiet yes—a prayer whispered in the dark, a phone call made for support, or writing down your story.

Journal Prompts for Your Fire Season

• What part of my current fire feels most overwhelming to me right now?
• Where am I resisting surrender, and what might it look like to release control to God in that area?
• What fears surface when I consider obeying God fully in this season?
• How has obedience in past seasons led to unexpected peace, growth, or purpose?
• What is one small act of radical trust I can take today?

Closing: The Fire Does Not Define You

Shawna’s story is a reminder that obedience in the fire isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about clinging to the One who does. The flames you’re walking through are not meant to destroy you; they are meant to refine you.

Radical obedience may look like tears on the floor, whispered prayers, or simply choosing not to give up. It may feel costly in the moment, but on the other side of surrender, there is always more of God’s presence, peace, and purpose.

If you’re in a fire season right now, know this: you are not alone. God is with you in the heat, and He is faithful to bring beauty from the ashes.

To go deeper into this conversation, listen to my two-part interview with Shawna Foster on the It’s Your Story to Tell podcast. Her journey through pain to purpose will remind you that the fire may shape you but it does not define you. God does.

Part 1: Rising from the Ashes : A Mother's Story of Loss, Hope and Faith

Part 2: From Scorched to Strengthened : How God Uses Pain to Ignite Healing feat. Shauna Foster | Part 2