One of the most honest questions a human heart can ask is this: God, where were You when I was hurting?

If you’ve ever whispered those words in the quiet of your room, or cried them out in desperation when no one else was listening, you’re not alone. The Bible itself is filled with people asking this same question David in the Psalms, Job in his suffering, even Jesus crying out on the cross. Asking where was God? doesn’t mean you lack faith. It means you’re longing for the kind of truth that anchors your soul when life doesn’t make sense.

On the It’s Your Story to Tell Podcast, I recently had the privilege of talking with Lilia Klaczynski, whose life embodies this very question. Her story is not only a testimony of survival and resilience—it’s also a living reminder that even when we cannot see Him, God is near.

A Childhood Without God’s Name

Lilia was born in the small country of Moldova, premature and weighing just 4 pounds 2 ounces. Abandoned at birth, she spent the next 15 years in a Soviet orphanage alongside 800 other children.

Faith was absent in that place. The only name revered was Lenin. Children grew up without parents, without nurture, and without even the concept of God.

And yet—even in those stark conditions God was not absent. Lilia recounted a moment when she was just a child, on the brink of death, and a miracle unfolded that she couldn’t explain at the time. She didn’t yet know God’s name, but He was already reaching into her story.

At 14, for the first time, she heard that there was a God who loved her. One year later, she was adopted into the United States a moment that seemed like her rescue.

When Rescue Doesn’t Mean Relief

Adoption, though a blessing, wasn’t a fairytale. The new beginning Lilia longed for came with its own set of hardships. Abuse and struggle followed her across the ocean, leaving her with deeper wounds to process.

For many of us, this is where the question grows sharp: If God saw her then, why didn’t He protect her now?

Lilia herself wrestled with those very questions. But her story didn’t end in pain. At age 21, she encountered Jesus personally, and everything shifted. She came to understand that God had been present all along—not only in the orphanage, not only in the pain of her teenage years, but in every step of her life.

Her healing didn’t come all at once. It came through surrender, faith, and the long, often slow work of letting God rewrite the lies that trauma had etched into her heart. Today, she is a wife of 20 years, a mother to four children, and a speaker who shares her testimony across the world.

Asking God Hard Questions

Lilia’s journey reminds us that it’s okay to ask God “Where were You?” It’s not a sign of unbelief it’s an invitation for Him to show us the places He was present when we couldn’t see.

What’s powerful is that even science confirms the importance of asking honest questions. Neuroscience shows that when we approach our pain with curiosity rather than judgment, the brain shifts out of survival mode. Instead of staying stuck in the amygdala the part of the brain responsible for fight, flight, or freeze we activate the prefrontal cortex, the region that allows us to regulate emotions, process meaning, and imagine new possibilities.

In other words, when you pause to ask, “Where was God in this moment?”, you’re not only opening your heart spiritually you’re also opening your brain to move from reactivity into reflection. Curiosity literally creates space for healing by calming the nervous system and allowing new connections to form.

Sometimes God answers with a memory a moment of peace that didn’t make sense at the time. Sometimes He reveals His presence through people He sent to stand with us. And sometimes the answer comes much later, when we see how He redeemed even the darkest parts of our story.

When we bring Him our raw and unfiltered questions, He doesn’t turn away. He meets us in the very places where we feel abandoned.

An Invitation for You

As you reflect on Lilia’s story, I want to invite you to consider your own.

Where have you felt abandoned? Where have you wondered if God saw you? What moments in your past still ache with the question: Where were You, God?

I believe that just as He met Lilia in the orphanage, and again years later when she cried out to Him, He will meet you in your pain, too.

Healing often begins with honesty—with allowing yourself to bring the unspoken questions before God. He isn’t threatened by your doubts or your desperation. He is a Father who draws near.

Reflection

Take a few quiet minutes, a journal, and an open heart. Let these questions guide you:

1. Remembering the Silence: Write about a time in your life when you felt God was absent. What emotions come up as you revisit that memory? Notice what happens in your body as you write.
2. Curiosity Instead of Judgment: When you think about that painful moment, shift from asking “Why did this happen to me?” to “What do I notice when I get curious about God’s presence here?” Pay attention to how your body feels as you make this shift.
3. Looking for Traces of Grace: Ask God to show you where He may have been present in that situation, even if you didn’t recognize Him at the time. Write down anything that surfaces—people, words, peace, or small moments of safety.
4. Naming the Questions: What questions about your pain do you still carry? Write them as letters directly to God. Don’t censor yourself. Allow curiosity and honesty to guide you.
5. Receiving His Presence: Imagine Jesus sitting with you in that memory. What expression is on His face? What words might He want you to hear?
6. Choosing to Trust: Where is God inviting you to release control and trust Him with part of your story today? Write a short prayer of surrender.

Closing Thoughts

Lilia’s story is powerful not because it’s tidy, but because it’s real. Her life shows us that God’s presence is not always obvious in the moment—but over time, His faithfulness becomes undeniable.

If you’ve been asking, “Where were You, God?”, know that you are not alone. And just as He never stopped pursuing Lilia, He has never stopped pursuing you.

Your pain is not wasted. Your story is not over. And even in the places you thought He was absent, God has been with you all along.